Trigger warning: mentions childhood sexual abuse
This is my contribution to the wonderful Novellas in November 2024 hosted by Cathy at 746 Books and Beck at Bookish Beck.
I heard about Beloved by Empar Moliner (transl. Laura McGloughlin 2024) through Stu at Winston’s Dad’s blog. I was immediately tempted and it seemed a good choice for my resolution to buy a book a month from an indie press/bookshop. The lovely 3TimesRebel Press even included a tote bag 😊
The striking cover illustration is by Anna Pont, a Catalan artist. She died from cancer earlier this year and all the proceeds from Beloved are being donated to cancer research.
The paw is courtesy of Fred aka Horatio Velveteen aka Mike Woznicat (as like the comedian Mike Wozniak he has a handsome moustache). Anyway, enough of my blithering about my cat. On with novellas!
Remei is in her early 50s and going through menopause. She is married to a musician ten years younger and at the start of the novella she has a revelation:
“Falling oestrogen, combined with lactose intolerance and loss of near sight, makes me see the world through the light wings of a dragonfly. Because of this I can see, with utter clarity, that my man is going to fall in love with this other woman.”
The novella follows Remei as she works out how she will manage this, as she tries to cope with her bodily changes and memories of a traumatic past at the same time.
She is a witty, forthright, slightly sardonic narrator. I really enjoyed the distinctive voice of this resilient woman.
“I must point out I find modesty overrated: I’m still a good deal. What’s more, until now I’ve performed pre-feminist sexual positions with total dedication and delight.”
Her husband, whom she calls Neptune, is not as clearly drawn. But this is not his story: we are firmly in the first person narration of Remei. She and her husband don’t seem hugely well-suited:
“I like music much more than him and I’m an illustrator. But he likes comics much more than me and he’s a musician.”
“I like everyone, in one way or another. He likes hardly anyone, in one way or another.”
“That’s how we see life too, he and I. Me: everything and right now, so nothing is left over. Him: only what fits, even if what is discarded will rot.”
But she loves him and she loves being a mother to their daughter. Her career is successful, although not quite in the way she planned. However, she is not entirely happy. She self-medicates with alcohol:
“My whole life is a gallop between the pretentious and the epic, depending only on how many drinks I’ve had.”
As she goes for runs with her friends, she reflects on the sexual abuse of her childhood, sanctioned by her family. She is estranged from her brother, after she spoke about what was happening and they were taken into care. Remei seems very much alone, despite all the people that surround her.
She is blisteringly honest about her attitude to her husband and the confusion of feelings as she recognises future events:
“Do I want him to continue to love me as much as ever? Yes. No. I want to float along, no more. I want him to be frozen.”
There is a lot of humour too. Remei never demonises Cris, the young colleague of her husband, but wryly observes her behaviour:
“Punctual, efficient, her ovaries functioning at top speed.”
Beloved shows how control is only sustained through the lightest of ties. Remei is a functional alcoholic who could tip over at any time; she realises her relationship with her daughter is on the brink of change as the latter grows older and more aware; she attempts to control her body with running but aging is relentless; and she takes steps to manoeuvre her husband and Cris in a way that will allow her to cope with the affair, but where will this leave her?
Remei is so flawed, so honest, so tenderly vulnerable and spikily self-sufficient, I was really rooting for her to find a way through all the hurt.
To end, the ever wonderful Tracy Chapman singing about changes in life:






